So my eyelid has taken to subtly twitching. I noticed it starting a couple of weeks ago- a sort of vibration, heartbeat in my eyelid- and it's gotten worse, to a point where there's only about fifteen minute intervals throughout the day where it's not twitching. And no one can see it unless they're close to my face and looking for it, but still, it's annoying and it's making me kind of self-conscious. I looked it up online and it could be stress or lack of sleep or a whole plethora of reasons- none of which really have a remedy. I'm hoping that once I get the week off from school after tomorrow it'll go away from lots of sleep and hardly any stress. If not? Que sera sera.

I haven't really done much this week. Last week was hectic and the weekend was kinda crappy (I found out that this girl that I can't really stand goes to the same therapist as me, which was weird for a whole slew of reasons, but whatever) so I've just been kind of bumming it this week. I don't have much to do over the break- I'm not going away or anything- so I've already started enjoying the laziness. I don't participate in gym class, I soak up the wonderfulness of European history (the crush on my teacher has turned into full-on hero worship-love-obsession and all my friends can't stand me because of it. but i can't help it, i love him! I also got yelled at by the boys' bowling coach because of it, but whatever), I screw around and make jokes in French class, I sit back and do my work in math class, and in humanities I don't even try to raise my hand anymore because she never calls on me anyway. I went to bowling practice and got flowers for the teachers who wrote my college recommendations for me, but other than that I haven't done much this week. And it's been wonderful.

Over the weekend- mainly when I got snowed in on Saturday- I watched some movies and TV shows. I saw Stick It which I loved and watched all the way through again on Sunday night, Shallow Hal, and I watched the first episode of Dollhouse, which I have to continue watching, and I watched two episodes of The Tudors. I'm not sure how I feel about The Tudors just yet. I watched part of the first episode when it first came out but it was a little too overtly sexual for me, so I didn't watch it after that. I rented it though and gave it another try (I'm a sucker for Tudor history) and it's okay. I mean, some parts are absolutely ridiculous and some scenes are like 'They can put this on TV?!' but it's all right. The third episode is when Henry meets Anne Boelyn, so maybe it'll get good?

New obsession: Michael Bublé. I always loved him, but recently- with the release of his new song, Just Haven't Met You Yet- I've fallen head over heels. I watch the music video of that song and listen to it at least a hundred times a day. His voice just makes me melt and go all gooey. If I can't have my history teacher (which, I know, I can't) I'd definitely go for Michael Bublé. Who is also too old for me. But whatever.

This week has been busy again.

Monday I had school, then bowling until seven, then homework until 9ish, then I worked out for an hour or so, then I crashed. Tuesday I had school, then bowling until seven, then homework until 10-11ish, managed to get a good half hour to talk to my sister, and then I tried to write a little before I knocked out. Today I had school and then I had to be in that stupid movie for my friends until 4ish, then I had to go to the mall to buy stuff for a project, then I had to do a shit ton of French homework and this project for AP European History. For the project we have a person from the Scientific Revolution and the Enlightenment and we have to make a visual display of who they were and what they did and write everything out (I have Margaret Cavendish, if anyone even knows who she is). On top of that, he's going to interrogate each of us in front of the class as if we were that person (extra credit points if you dress up as the person, which I am) and if you don't know the person inside and out and backwords and sideways you get points off. I love my teacher (remember this horrible obsession of mine?) and I want to impress him, so I worked my ass for this project. Somehow, I still feel like it's not good enough, but we'll see.

Tomorrow I have to go to school and I have French first period (kjsghkljehlkejglekjgekjg NO!), then I have to present my project, then I have Child Development, then I have to sell resusable water bottles and thermoses for the environmental club during lunch, then I have math (*grumbles*) then a quiz on Greek art in Humanities (*grumbles again*) then I have gym and I think we have to do the stupid dance we had to make up in front of the class. DHJLKEJHEKJGEKEJHKEG. Then after school I can't go to bowling practice because I have a doctor's appointment, then I'll have some time to do homework, then I have another doctor's appointment, and then I have to decorate the tree with my family so I might miss The Office. Sigh.

Honestly, my friends have so much more stuff to do than I do and they don't get bogged down like I do. Sara and Joelle are both in band, take all honors and APs, tutor, and are applying to college too, and they don't freak out and feel stressed out like I do. I guess it's because I've just gotten by in high school- slacking off and skipping homework assignments so I wouldn't feel too overwhelmed ever, never studying and getting by with mostly Bs and the occasional C- and for some reason this year I've buckled down on myself. It doesn't help that I'm taking the most important and hardest classes I've ever taken this year. I wish I had free periods but I won't have them until the second half of the year- God, things would be a lot easier if I had frees.

On the bright side, I'm pretty much done with applying to college. All I need to do is write and send one more essay and then it's just a matter of waiting to hear back from them. *crosses fingers* let's hope that works out.

Is this week over yet?

A List of Things That Piss Me Off:
(in no particular order)
1. When you try so hard to be there for a person and help them when the're going through a rough time but they treat you like shit when they're having a bad day anyway.
(i.e.: when I was trying to cheer Alice up and she told me to suck a dick?)
2. When people blatantly make a show of being more excited to see other friends then they are when they hang out with you?
(i.e.: Alice hanging out with her other friends tonight)
3. When you tell people everything and have no problem when they ask questions about your life, and then they tell you simple jack shit.
(i.e.: see above.)
4. When people write their statuses about you, as if they want to get a reaction from you, and you can't react because it will only satisfy them.
(i.e. Cristin, all the time)
5. The economy!
6. The cold.

There's more, I'm just too annoyed to put anymore.

.... needs to end.

By the standards of my life, I have been pretty swamped this week. On Monday I had school, then a bowling match (why the hell did I try out for the bowling team again?) which lasted until seven. We lost, but I did get the highest score out of our girls' varsity team! Then right after that I went home to grab something to eat for dinner and went straight to my middle school for an alumni holiday concert rehearsal, where my old music teacher made fun of Les Mis to tease me until 8, when I left and went to pick Cait up so we could go to Joelle's and watch Gossip Girl where I was grateful I had no homework and pigged out like it was nobody's business. On Tuesday I fizzled out completely and didn't go to school. I felt run down and shitty so, yeah, I took a day off. But I realized I didn't have any of my books to do my homework at around nine (and I really didn't need my French teacher screaming at me again) so I went to the school, praying that it was unlocked- which it was, for some meeting- and got my stuff and ended up doing homework for a couple of hours. Today, I went to school, almost had to film a movie with my friends but then they didn't need me and I went home, worked out, and I've been doing homework ever since. Sigh.

Tomorrow I'll have school, bowling practice until six-ish, and then I'll come home to eat dinner and maybe do homework before I go to therapy, and then straight over to the middle school for the concert until 9:30ish. I'll have to do my homework while we wait to go on, because I won't have any other time. Geez, I can't wait until Christmas break, when I have no homework and all of my college stuff is just out of the way.

ooooooof!